You muppet

A phone rings. A short pause.

J: ‘Hello?’
A: ‘Hi it’s me.
J: ‘Hi, how are you? Why are you calling in the middle of the day? I’m at work.’
A: ‘I was just calling to say I’m on the train.’
J: ‘Which train?’
A: ‘The train to London.’
J: ‘Oh – why are you coming to London?’
A: ‘To see you, you muppet!’
J: ‘Oh.’
Brain audibly chugs.
J: ‘When did we arrange this?’
A (exasperated): ‘Last week.’

Sigh.

Oh dear. I used to pride myself on having a good memory. Of late, my brain has developed craters. Not just small holes through which I lose phone numbers, forget to take my lunch to work. No, these are huge gapping caverns that swallow whole conversations, situations, meetings, events. Maybe I should start doing the sudoku – isn’t that meant to prevent dementia?